I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
