No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Randomize
