The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
