im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize