Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Can't talk, ducks in the car
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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