Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
