woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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