What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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