so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
