I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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