Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
