put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
