she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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