So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
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