wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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