There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
