I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight