i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
