Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
