Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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