If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
