69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
