Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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