i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Sorry about my life...
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
