We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
