his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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