he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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