My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
