Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
