haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Randomize
