Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
pop tarts are not kleenex
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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