she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
