You made me cry and you don't even care
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
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He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
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What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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