Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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