People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
