i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Green mimosas i think yes
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize
