BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize