Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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