Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
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