I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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