i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
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