would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
