Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(904): View more from Florida

You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.

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(828): View more from North Carolina

yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion

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(336): View more from North Carolina

i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.

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(701): View more from North Dakota

You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.

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