i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I think my moral compass just broke
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