Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..