is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
It's official drugs can't kill me
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize
