the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
You are a genius and a whore.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
