shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize