Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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