I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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