Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
